My name is Roxanna and I want to enjoy every day.

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When I grow up I'm going to be an old woman

Aging. Some of us fight it. Some of us just give up.

I'm not doing either of these things.

I've decided that I'm going to live my days in preparation for fabulous old ladyhood. I'm absolutely serious about this. I'm going to rock that party, assuming I'm lucky enough to make it that far.

There are no guarantees but trust me, I'm planning for it.

Why waste precious time fighting time? Why try to recapture youth? Youth was great, but it can't come back. And there is nothing sadder than a person trying to look younger than they are.  (I'm talking to you, all of the real housewives of wherever).

When I grow up, I'm going to be an old woman, and it's going to be fierce.

Carmen Dell'Orefice (turned 80 this month!)

Instead of letting myself go and someday facing a stranger in the mirror, I take care of myself. I do it gently -- beauty treatments and rituals can and should be pleasurable.

I don't do it because I want to stay young. I do it because I want to look my best. Who says your best is in the past? (OK, lots of people think that. Don't believe them.)

I look in the mirror daily and care for the person I'm still growing into.

Twyla Tharp Gap ad (she's approaching seventy in this picture)

Instead of giving up and spending my days on the couch, I'm exercising so my body grows leaner and stronger.


Instead of fearing a lonely old age, I'm nurturing my friendships. Bonus side effect: Life today is more fun thanks to my friends. I look forward to even more laughs in the future.

Instead of trying to do it all at once, I'm doing what I want first, confident that there will be time for most of of it. And if something doesn't happen and it's too late, well, too bad. I hope to have enough amazing things accomplished so that I can look back at how I've lived with joy.

I'm grateful for my family: My husband, my parents, my kids, my siblings. They're the link to my past and my future.

That future, of course, is to be an old woman. A very fabulous one, if all goes as planned.

Reader Comments (27)

Love this. So much of looking good is loving who you are. Here's to being a hot, strong, confident, and kick-ass old lady!

June 14, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDesi

Agree! My grandma was a fierce, very old lady (she was nearly 101 when she passed) and always cared about looking great. Who needs plastic surgery when you know how to put on make-up and dress for your shape? That's what she believed and instilled in me. She also believed in spending more time with young people and less time with "old" (to her, old was like 20 years younger than she was!).

June 14, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLaura@JourneyChic

Hear, hear

June 14, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRoxanna

She sounds amazing!

June 14, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRoxanna

Beautiful post. It reminds me to be more gentle with myself when I'm cursing the bags under my eyes that visit my daily now. Thank you!

June 14, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChristine

You are a better woman than I. I believe I'll be fighting it kicking and screaming in the hopes of pulling off a Carmen Dell'Orifice. But, yes, at least the friends can laugh along the ride...

June 14, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPam

Wow, what a great post. I have always looked forward to being a fabulous old woman too. You have put it so beautifully!

I adore you.

June 15, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermaile

[...] Youth? Sure, it’s great. But I’m looking forward to becoming an old woman. [...]

AMEN. I was telling a friend the other day how much I anticipate being an older woman so that I can have long, luscious gray hair that is well kept. She looked at me like I was nuts, but I think women who wear their hair long and gray (or even better, white!) look stunning. I just want to grow old and embrace it. Some people will never be that lucky.

June 17, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterbethany

I know! There's something about white hair -- it's so elegant!

June 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRoxanna

This was beautiful. I'm bookmarking this so I can read it when I need it.

June 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAshlie

Great post (thanks to Nicole at Making it Lovely for pointing me over here)!

Whenever I see Iris Apfel I get excited about getting older. I am totally going to be rocking some serious bright pink lipstick, fantastic prints, and major jewelry.

All of that great wisdom and experience will be great, too ;)

Oh man, this post is so great! Came across your blog via another blogger, and it's super cute! :)

June 23, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

I was blessed to have a grandmother full of spunk, style & grace. She loved champagne and ever-so-slightly dirty jokes -- both of which we enjoyed together before she passed during a late afternoon nap.

I am sometimes chided by my husband, and one particular gal pal, for not being shy about telling my age or sometimes sarcastically referring to myself as "old". What they fail to understand is I am proud of my age, both chronological & spiritual.

I totally agree -- it's not about trying to look younger than you are, it's about taking care of yourself so you look your best possible self, even when sporting workout togs & a day old do.

June 23, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFortuitous Housewife

Love, love, love, this post! So encouraging. I am currently trying to face my fear of aging, before it becomes a reality and I have a complete breakdown.

I think that our society has really embraced particular ideals of beauty, (i.e. thin and tan) and youthfulness is apart of that. I hope that women can fight these ideas and show that beauty comes in many forms (and ages)!

Thank you so muchm ladies!

June 25, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRoxanna

My plan for some time has been to look my best in my 50's. This post is inspiring.

June 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEmily

[...] my 30th birthday is only a few weeks away, I found this essay particularly [...]

I love what you had to say. I'm turning 59 in November and I'm working on being the best I can be at this age. I love my life and I want to live it as a healthy, fun, and an up for anything old woman!! I have 2 daughters and 2 grandaughters and I want to know they can do anything they want at any age! Thank you for your beautiful words!

August 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterElaine

Love this post! My Grammi was as fierce as they come and inspires me daily to be who I want to be! Great writing!

December 14, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPatrice

SuperHomeBrewer on July 2, 2011 @markp1078 My cclakbink account is doing quite fine and appreciates your concern.

February 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTiny

[...] Uncategorized You all know how I feel about growing older – and know you must meet Lynn Dell, who is my [...]

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered Commenter“Fashion says ‘me

[...] enough of them, and this article on CNN is spot on. I won’t rehash what they said, and I’ve said my piece before. Just watch, read and [...]

Thank you for this story, it was fierce and fabulous. That's how I am going to grow up, at least try! :)

October 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnna

I love this so much I pinned it on Pinterest (which is also where I found it) and I posted it to Facebook!
Very wise words. And I love the picture of Twyla Tharp :-)

October 5, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMarisa Catena

How inspiring!!!!! I turned 50 just recently. I have been fighting a fear of growing old and
ending up in a NH or with a debilitating condition... both of which happened to my mom and dad
respectively. But this gives me new hope. Yes i will fight the fear but not the number. I plan on being an active fiesty old lady too. Its only a number. Thx again. You go girl!!!

November 2, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermary z

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